The Light of the Stars

My close friends and family know that I am obsessed with stars. I always have been and I probably always will be. There is something so captivating about them. I'm infatuated with the way they shine, form constellations and the way they fall, never to be seen again. Their light shines through the night, piercing the darkness so beautifully. I love to lay outside and just look at them for hours, pondering, wondering and thinking about anything and everything. God loves to speak to me through the stars. He loves to teach me little things. My favorite name for God is Breather of the stars. It has such a captivating essence to it. It makes me stand in such great awe of my Lord.... He breathes stars! WOW!
Probably one of the most memorable times the Lord spoke to me was through a friend. It was corprate week (week 4) and one of my team members leaned over and said "God loves you more than all the stars combined." I looked at him blankly then burst into tears.... I had not told anyone on my team how much I loved stars... How would he know how much that means to me. "God wanted you to know that, He told me to tell you that Micah." He said. I just looked at him and said "Thank you." "God," I thought "I love you too." The meaning of those words went deep into my soul. "God loves me more that ALL the stars combined." Whoa.
Week five finally came and let me say that I was a bit skeptical. This was "Holy Spirit" week. Now, before YWAM I was a bit skeptical on the whole "Holy Spirit" thing. I never put God in a box but the idea of the Holy Spirit kind of made me feel a bit uncomfortable because I had no understanding of Him what-so-ever. Anywho, I sat and listened to our speaker (Amy) but the more I listened the more I was convinced that what she was saying was true. She lined everything up with scripture and every doubt or question I've ever had was knocked down with a Bible verse and answered. One of my favorite things she said was "God is my father, Jesus is my lover and Holy Spirit is my friend"... Wow, I had never thought of it that way before. Another day we prayed to receive the Holy Spirit. "If you can speak in tongues than you've already received the Holy spirit." Amy said. "Well, I can speak in tongues so I guess I'm good!" I thought "Besides, I am NOT going to fall over like some people do... (At the time this still creeped me out a little)." So, when the time came, we began singing some worship songs as people were receiving prayer. There I stood. worshiping like everyone else. People were being prayed for and they were being baptized in the Holy spirit. I opened my eyes a little while worshiping (yes I confess) and I saw Amy making her way towards me... "Nope. No, no, no God. I have the Holy spirit... See? I'm speaking in tongues." I then began to pray in tongues so God and Amy would see and know I already had the Holy Spirit. She began to pray for me anyway. "God, I better not fall over." I told the Lord. Then Amy said "Lord we pray that you would send your Holy Spirit down and she would be filled in Jesus' name." Suddenly I felt a breath come into my lungs and something land hard in the pit of my gut. I burst into uncontrollable sobs and so many emotions filled my mind and I was filled. Later I was contemplating what happened and I asked the Lord, He simply said "Micah, I have breathed in you the light of the stars." and again, I began to weep... It was then that I began to believe that God did see me and notice me... He knew me.

The Moment My Heart Stopped

I suppose everyone has had a moment in life where it felt as though their heart may have stopped. I experienced this the day I found out where I would be going on outreach for two and a half months. Now, before I go further I must tell you that, ever since I was a little girl, I have been in love with India. I don't know why I had/have such an affinity towards the people or the country but I do know that it is the Lord that put it in my heart. As a young girl I was always the Indian princess needing to be rescued, painting red dots on my head and begging my mother to buy me a princess Jasmine outfit. As I grew older days of make pretend turned into having an India themed room, complete with lanterns and a bedspread filled with rich colors. I just loved it. I couldn't even explain to people why I loved it so much... India was just engraved on my heart and probably always will be. 

Anyway, whenever I informed people that I was going to YWAM (beginning two years before actually going) I would tell them I planned on going to India on outreach. They asked how I knew this and I said "Well, I'm not sure if it's a choice but that's where I want to go." 

To my dismay, I was informed upon arriving in Kona that India was probably not a choice because the school I had chosen doesn't ever go to India. Needless to say I was heartbroken but I knew I was where I needed to be so I just told the Lord, "I don't know what you think you're doing but I trust you." (Yes, sometimes I speak with God in a sassy tone). 

The day finally came where we would find out our choices for outreach. I sat there, expectant... "What will they be..." I thought. Little did I know that just two weeks before they decided to make India and outreach location. "America, South Africa, India..." My mind went blurry..... "did they just say INDIA?!" I gave out a little scream, I could hardly sit in my seat... later that day I prayed and prayed and called my parents for guidance... I knew I was supposed to go to India. I knew it, they knew it... Later I sent in my top three choices and waited for the day when they would announce teams.

Finally the day came when I would find out who my new family was (at least for the next two and a half months). "Team India!" the speaker announced. "Ohmygosh.... what if I'm not on the list?!" I panicked... The speaker started announcing names, none of them were mine. My heart sank. Finally, it sounded like they were done, like the team was full... Then, they said MY name! I shrieked.... stood up, I was shaking so bad... There I was (probably looking like a fool) trying to run up to my team but I couldn't really see through my tears. I tripped over some chords and a rug and embraced my new family. "Could this be real?" I thought, then a peace came over me and I knew it was.

The following days we would sit together during lecture, hang out on the weekends and have awesome team times getting to know each other. I knew from the beginning that I had the best team in the world.